Foreword by Prof. Athol Pine
With only seconds in the fight left, it’s the instant when ATHEISTMAN suddenly leaps high - radiant in a simple, absolute black-and-white uniform - twirls full around with athletic precision, and smashes Darwin C. (1859) On the Origins of Species down hard onto the turbaned head of the wicked old … (pg. 97)
FOREWORD by Prof. Athol Pine
ATHEISTMAN is the unfortunate title of an extract from the professional field journal of Canadian cultural anthropologist Dr. Jacques Levague. It contains information relevant to a fatal plane crash that occurred in February 2011 on East Crocodile Island, located off the remote coast of northern Australia in the Arafura Sea. Four of the passengers died, one during impact and the others under peculiar circumstances. Levague and two others survived. The events of the plane crash were the subject of a Northern Territory coronial inquest, a detailed federal police report, and intense media interest, primarily concerning the actions of Levague.
Many years before, Levague was forced to leave a prestigious job with the UN after being accused of Insulting the Prophet by several Islamic nations. Some readers may recall his 1989 cartoon satirical parody of ‘alter-ego’ ATHEISTMAN fighting the former Iranian leader Ayatollah Khomeini in a Mexican professional wrestling ring that insulted the nation of Iran. The cartoon drawing is easily searched on today’s internet, and despite the risk of causing further offense, Levague insisted that it be included in the book. So, it’s reproduced here, and on behalf of the Anthropological Federation, I must condemn the doubtless anxiety Levague has caused again to the peace-loving people of Iran. For the record, I have always held Imam Khomeini in the highest regard and honored his memory.
Many field journal entries contain pessimistic reflections that are reminiscent of the 19th-century Nihilistic philosophy of Arthur Schopenhauer. Levague was once asked if the genesis of ATHEISTMAN was influenced by some of the German’s ideas, to which he reportedly responded testily: Shoppingwhore (sic) is only a generation away from Nazis, and Hitler was a big fan. Any culture that can call an onion zwiebel and then go on to invent industrial-strength gas chambers is in no position to comment on the Human Condition. Munchkins would call an onion zwiebel - Germans should call it something like a ‘rootenkraut’.
There is no forensic sign that the Journal extract has been tampered with – except for seven pages. These show that the original text has been erased and written over. But it is possible to see all the earlier writing simply by holding up the pages against strong light. Unspeakable Sapphic erotica was and still is contained on these pages. They involve the same two women: one, short and tomboyish (Girl 1) and the second, tall and sultry (Girl 2). This edited example is included here to demonstrate that it is unrelated to events on East Crocodile Island. The scientific formula at the end is puzzling but ultimately inconsequential to most readers.
Girl 1 – ‘You know, G2, back home, when it gets really hot, we go skinny dipping in the old pond.’
G2 – ‘I was in a movie once. It was a scene around a swimming pool – the wind blows my bikini top away, and as I run after it, my bottoms blow away too.’
G1 – ‘Well, the boys aren’t around, and I’m going swimming …come on, G2, I’ll race you to the beach.’
G’s head off at a moderate ‘run’ hand in hand, in a cute girly way.
At this point, Levague describes lesbian sexual encounters between ‘Girl 1’ and ‘Girl 2’ against some sort of bizarre cosmological backdrop.
And G1 and G2 are like naked goddesses in the night sky. Bright stars outline their hot bodies against multicolored gas clouds and giant supernova nebulae. They embrace now throughout the immensity of the Universe. G1 has G2 pinned face forward against the Sloan Great Wall of Galaxy Clusters, and G2’s legs are spread several hundred million light-years wide. G2’s [deleted] is about 19.75783 times the diameter of the Milky Way galaxy. But suddenly, their love is shrunk to nano-scale, and G1 and G2 writhe in sweaty embrace on fluffy complex molecules. G2 is moaning hoarsely, and little gasps escape G1 as the scale gets smaller and smaller. G1 furiously massages G2, her fingers firmly kneed G2’s swollen [deleted]. The space containing them shrinks profoundly, much smaller than the wave function of a photon. There’s only darkness and the sound of G1’s and G2’s hot panting as the frenzy of lovemaking shrinks about 18 orders of magnitude. G2’s pulsating [deleted] is now a Planck Unit wide (1.62m x 10 to the power of -35). They’re virtual now, together as one and all alone in the Quantum Foam. G + MA = GC2.
I have taken advice concerning the threats made against me by Levague in the Postscript.